Flash forward a few years. It is now my turn to hit the shops for the dreaded MOB dress, and I think I finally understand my friend's concerns. It isn't so much that you want to look perfect, you just don't want to ruin your beautiful daughter's bridal photos.
I despise shopping at the best of times, so I was not looking forward to spending a day at Bridal shops with The Princess Bride.
She had already nixed a pretty dress that I'd found at a consignment store earlier in the week.
According to The Princess Bride, this dress should be called: The Velveteen Rabbit plays the Mandolin at the Tudor Court.
Her words - exactly.
Fine. My taste in dresses could be suspect. I buy a new dress about once every twenty years. Perhaps, I am out of date.
Off to the bridal shops we went, full of high hopes.
Have you seen the dresses for mothers in these places? After trying on dress after dress, the only thing I could think of was Carole Burnett wearing those curtains in her Scarlet O'Hara spoof. If the dress doesn't make you look a hundred years old, it really does look like it has been constructed from heavy taffeta curtains.
I can't begin to describe how thrilling it is to try on dress after dress that make you look like an art deco nightmare.
All while The Princess Bride chuckles it up.
.....hilarious.....
(p.s. this lovely creation was priced at $600)
We said adios to the bridal shops, and headed off to Yorkdale to hit some of the trendier women's shops.
And there we found 'The Dress' according to the bride. She LOVED it.
Me? Not so much.
I could not sit down in it...at all. (It's only one night, Mom...you don''t have to sit down)
Not only was the skirt part too tight (I think it was constructed of Spanx material) but the heavy bodice had no give. Every time I tried to sit down, the bodice rode up, coming to rest somewhere between my nose and my eyes.
What do you think?
(p.s. those aren't my boobs - the womanly flesh that usually settles south of my waist apparently had to find somewhere to go once I squeezed into the tight skirt)
Needless to say, I put my foot down.... gently. My feet were killing me. I'd brought a pair of high heels in order to get a sense of what the dresses would look like with the proper shoes, and nearing the end of the day I could barely walk.
Off we went to the more sedate, Laura.
And, with time running out, we SETTLED on the right dress.
It's black. That's good right? Covers a multitude of problem areas.
It fits, sort of.
The bodice is kind of okay, I guess.
I can wear my hair up. That will be nice. I've always wanted to wear a black bow in my hair.
The Princess Bride said she liked it.
When I got home and modeled the new, and moderately expensive gown, The Father of the Bride exclaimed, "Why aren't you going to wear the first one you bought. I LOVE that one. You look gorgeous in that one."
"Don't I look good in this one?" I ask
He smiles, weakly then says, "It's very nice."
Very nice....
Super.
