Comparison is the Death of Joy - Mark Twain

Now that I am well into the marketing aspect of my debut novel, I am reminded of Mark Twain's brilliant statement. 

Marketing, after all, is all about comparisons. How many Likes to I have? How many hits did I get? How many followers? How many views? Did I do better than the other guy? Worse?

Implicit in those plaintive queries of course, is the larger, more insidious question. Am I good enough?

If you're like me, you immediately gravitate toward the negative. You know the drill. The concept is dull, the writing is crap, and the final product is pure, unadulterated shite - or something to that effect.

For others, the opposite is true. They see themselves as the next Tolstoy, Hemingway or Monroe. Reality, when it strikes, is a bitter pill for these deluded souls.

Whether negative or positive, judging yourself is a no-win situation. You will always come up short.

We all know what self-judgment sounds like...

"You'll couldn't write your way out of a paper bag, ya hack." 

"A kid in grade one paints better than you ever could." 

"Your singing sounds like a strangled cat."

"It doesn't matter how great you are, you'll never get as many views as the latest mommy porn writer. You'll always be average."

We also know what happens when we listen to that nasty little voice. We don't even try. We shut down our creativity for fear of coming up short, of being laughed at, of failing. 

And, as I head into the marketing phase, I am going to do my best to follow through on all the tasks I'm given by my marketing team. I'll keep my author website current, attend writing conferences as needed, and participate in author forums, etc. Whatever they ask, I'll do it. 

What I won't do, is watch the numbers. Simon and Schuster can worry about that. Whether my book sells fifty thousand copies or five hundred is irrelevant to me, and always has been.

My goal in writing this book was to put my ideas on paper, and to improve as a writer. I have succeeded on both counts - far beyond my wildest dreams. 

And I know that if I want to continue along this joyous path, then I must be vigilant against comparing myself to others. 

There will always be those who are worse, and those who are better. 

I'm okay with that.

I'm content as I am...happily messing about with my stories.

Feeling good. 

 

 

 





 

 




 

 


 



  

Kinky Sex: A Dumpy Dilemma

Last week, my publisher at Simon & Schuster asked if I would agree to participate in the International Festival of Authors digital festival on Wattpad. From October 1st to the 23rd, Wattpad will be showcasing one author per day. Other participants include Margaret Atwood and Vincent Lam. 

Of course, I said a great big YES!

My big day will be October 20.

Here comes the dilemma. My publicist at S & S suggested that I not use an excerpt taken directly from the book. She said readers respond better to stand-alone pieces - a snippet of back story, an unrelated short story featuring the main character, or a scene that didn't make the final cut.

No problem, I thought. I left almost as many words on the cutting floor as wound up in the manuscript. I just had to find something that tickled my fancy. I sifted through a realms of material, sorting it into yes, no and maybe piles. Then I flipped through it all again, and kept coming back to one particular scene.

It was a sex scene between Signy and her bad-boy ex boyfriend, Zef. It didn't make the final cut because I just couldn't make the time lines fit. Perfect, I thought - I'll dust off the old chestnut, update the writing and submit it.

Problem is, in the course of re-writing, I found the sex between Signy and Zef was getting kinkier and kinkier. I didn't mean it to - nor was I being gratuitous - it just evolved that way. I understand Signy much better than I did when I first wrote the scene, and I have no doubt that she would use sex as a tool to regain balance in her life. And in this scene - she does just that. It is raw, unfettered, and definitely R rated.

I stayed far away from throbbing pistons and womanly flowers. I have no hard bits being overtly inserted into any soft pieces. I tried to focus on sights, smells, touch, sounds, and made liberal use of metaphor.

That being said - it is still pretty damned hard-core.
 
I emailed my publicist telling her what I'd prepared, and suggested that maybe we should go with an excerpt from the book instead. Blown Red is a thriller after all - not an erotic novel - wouldn't a rough sex scene be false advertising? In addition, this would be my first ever attempt at erotica - a difficult enough genre for a skilled writer. In the hands of a novice, the portrayal of sexual encounter can be positively cringe-worthy.

Not to mention that there are 34 million members on Wattpad! Can you spell H.U.M.I.L.I.A.T.I.O.N?

I was certain the publicist would agree with me.

No such luck. She wrote back to say that on Wattpad, kinky sex is big draw. She told me to keep plugging along (no pun intended)

I can't even post it under an assumed name!



Gaaack!!


What to do? What to do?


I would appreciate any advice!